Saturday, November 3, 2012

Halfway to the Grave is Awesome and You Should Read It Now

Halfway to the Grave
by Jeaniene Frost (Website | Blog | Facebook | Twitter)
Series: Night Huntress, #1
Published: October 30th, 2007 by Avon
Pages: 358 (Paperback)
Goodreads | Amazon | Indie
Half-vampire Catherine Crawfield is going after the undead with a vengeance, hoping that one of these deadbeats is her father--the one responsible for ruining her mother's life. Then she's captured by Bones, a vampire bounty hunter, and is forced into an unholy partnership.

In exchange for finding her father, Cat agrees to train with the sexy night stalker until her battle reflexes are as sharp as his fangs. She's amazed she doesn't end up as his dinner--are there actually "good" vampires? Pretty soon Bones will have her convinced that being half-dead doesn't have to be all bad. But before she can enjoy her newfound status as kick-ass demon hunter, Cat and Bones are pursued by a group of killers. Now Cat will have to choose a side . . . and Bones is turning out to be as tempting as any man with a heartbeat.

*Warning: Contains lots of GIFs and spoilers*

As my first foray into adult urban fantasy, I’m so glad I fell in love with this book. I’m excited for more! With so many feelings, a cohesive review is completely out of the question. So here’s a list of why you should read Halfway to the Grave! Well, one part list of awesomeness, and like, I don’t know… 53 million parts love letter to Cat, Bones, and Jeaniene Frost.

1. Catherine Kathleen Crawfield, you are one badass mamma jamma. This woman is the definition of fierce. She’s smart, independent, strong, and hello – she hunts vampires! But she’s not all snark and kickassery. Nuh-uh. Cat is naïve! and insecure! and impulsive! She’s totally relatable! You know… except for the whole part about her being a murderer by the time she was in high school. Cat - be my BFFL? Except keep them freaky vamps away me.

2. OH AND THE SEXUAL TENSION! Jeaniene, why must you toy with my emotions over and over and over again? D: Every time I think Bones and Cat are finally gonna bang, or kiss, or Bones will declare his undying love and need for her, you ruin it with some super intense fight scene! Or you make Cat pass out. Or you make them fight. Or… or… something else that would be totally awesome if it just didn’t interrupt the romance! >:0 meeeeeeeeeh

3. But when it happens, it happens and ohh my gosh it so worth it. Every time something cute happened this was me, only times a hundred. (You don't wanna know what I looked like when I got to the car scene. I can only say I'm glad I was home alone during that. xD) The buildup is perfect and addictive. I had ALL the feelings waiting for these two to finally realize they’re made for each other. <3 Awww I’m getting chuffed to bits just thinking about them. *sigh* young love… bahahah. I ship them so hard.

4. Sighhhh. Oh my gosh Bones! Crispin Phillip Arthur Russell III… Sweet, smoldering, loyal and asdfkjadkl. Too many emotions. Too. Many. Marry me? Please? Actually no, don’t. You and Cat are soul mates. SOUL MATES! And even if you weren’t and for some reason you didn’t hold up your promise to always find her (AWWHH HOW CUTE IS THAT?!), Cat would come after me and I just don’t think I have the knife throwing skills or the ruthlessness necessary to survive being on that woman’s bad side.

5. This book is hilarious and smart! It balances out all the darkness, while keeping me super entertained.

"Sixteen vampires you took out yourself with nothing but a stake and your cleavage? Makes me ashamed of my kind, it does."
"Are you telling me bloody caramel apples and books taught you how to kill vampires? Is that what you’re saying? ... It’s a damn good thing most of the recent generations are nearly illiterate or we’d all be in serious trouble. Blimey."

6. I mentioned the action right? Shit. Gets. Cray. I loved it.

7. Oooooo Jeaniene Frost you are clever. I couldn’t figure out where the plot was going until it happened. I was never lost, but I loved being so surprised! You tied everything together in a wonderful and heartbreaking way that literally left my mouth hanging open.

8. That ending! Why Jeaniene, why?? You are so cruel! How could you do that Bones? Shit, how could you do that to ME? Oh my poor heart. The FEELINGS! I see what you did there, Jeaniene. So yes, I will read the next book, but my heart can’t take anymore scenes like that. D':

Progression of my feelings during that ending:

Phase 1: shock

 Phase 2: disbelief

Phase 3: sadness (Bill is Britney here)

Phase 4: full fledged heart ache

Phase 4: anger

Phase 5: acceptance

Well, obviously Halfway to the Grave is amazing. You should now promptly travel to your nearest bookstore and buy a copy. See for yourself how swoon worthy Bones is. *nudge nudge* I swear guys, I need to stop reading about such gorgeous and sexy undead men... Bill will eventually get tired of me proclaiming things like OMG OMG OMG OMG GUESS WHAT BONES/DIMITRI/ADRIAN JUST SAID/DID??? AWWWW SO FRIGGIN CYYUUUTE! while flailing around when he’s trying to sleep.

- Alysson

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